New Year's Eve--ugh--count down lists, fireworks, and champagne...none of which I'm participating in. I wasn't going to write anything about New Year's, except now I am and I don't like the fact that I am. And for the record--"I am not making any kind of resolution because I always break my resolutions and then I resent the New Year for making me make a New Year's resolution and I really don't want to start off 2008 resentful towards the New Year!" Its not really the New Year's fault, I just like to blame it. I know, I'm kinda grumpy today. Speaking of which...
I am not going to go on a diet tomorrow...just wanted to get that one out of the way. Then why did I buy that 8 pack of Slim Fast on Saturday? Because I like the 'idea' of going on a diet. Or rather the results of going on a diet. I imagine all the great clothes I'd buy, the athletic challenges I'd attempt, how people would take a double look because they wouldn't recognize "Skinny Deb". And looking at that red and white box in the fridge reminds me of those wonderful dreams, of what could be. If Valerie Bertinelli can say she is going to wake up New Year's Day and for the first time not think about her weight, then I say "sounds good to me!"
How do you break off a relationship that you have had for 40 years? A one-sided relationship, a relationship where the other half is totally dependent on you to be kept alive; and unless you cut things off, the other half will continue to bury itself deeper and deeper in you. It says to you, ' How could you leave me? I've been there for you. One of your first memories is of me and you together. We've grown up together.' T.V. junkie doesn't do it justice. Couch potato isn't accurate. On the couch, your mouth drooling, a vacant stare, hugging the remote, maybe. But potato?, no. Television wasn't invented to enslave generation after generation to the mind-numbing effects of QVC. At least I don't think it was. And if it wasn't meant for that, when exactly did we give television that control? When did television decide it was the right moment to make a power play for our lives? Television (or as I like to call it, ' Mr. PottyMouth') has grabbed a hold of us and in our desire to 'zone out' we've welcomed that ever tightening grip. So today I'm taking a stand. I'm wiping that drool from my chin and taking the batteries out of the remote! Let's throw out those TV Guides and go check out that place that's called "the front porch"! Hurrah!
I started looking around some of the other blogs this evening...you ever get that feeling that you missed the part of the invitation that says "black tie"? You show up for the party and everyone is in a prom dress and you're in a pair of overalls? I'm starting to think my invitation was not only missing a vital piece of information, but actually got lost in the mail. There are some very creative people out there in the worldwideweb with some very impressive websites. "How did they do that?" was muttered a few times as I looked around. But now I remind myself that this isn't a competition, not everything is about who's is better, nicer, cuter...it's not middle school (oh how thankful I am that it's not middle school!). So, I'm thankful for other blogs. I'm thankful that they can and will inspire me. You gotta crawl before you walk, unless of course you're the type that walked before you crawled, but then that's where I get confused...how do you walk before you crawl? Sorry....drifted off again.
As I was weaving my shopping cart through the aisle of 50% off Christmas stuff this morning, I thought "Why I am here?". No, not the deep, soul-searching "Why I am here?", no I mean the "Why I am here shopping for stuff I didn't want or need two days ago?" question. Of course once I was able to answer that with, "I need gift bags for next year", another thought came to mind. I thought about how depressing and lonely yesterday must have been for a lot of people. Stores and restaurants closed. Cold and rainy weather. Families unhappy with the unrealized expectations of spending Christmas with each other. Now I'm depressed and lonely....sorry, drifted away there for a second. Anyway, when I got home, I went back to the devotion and scripture I read this morning which included Hebrews 13:5, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." What else do I need to know? He is trustworthy, His promises are true. In our times of loneliness, even in the midst of family and friends, He is there. He is always there. That is an exhortation that should be shouted from the rooftops and whispered into the smallest of ears.
My friend Sue emailed me this week and shared her new adventure into the world of blogging. So having been inspired, now I've decided to take that step (more like a leap) into the worldwideweb of "will they think I'm weird?", "what if I share too much?", or even "your grammar is atrocious!". I've been told that I write like I talk, without the flinging hands that seem to have a life of their own. I don't have much of a clue of what I plan to write about, but just the idea of someone else reading the words I've written is very humbling. So, like Butch and Sundance grabbing hands and jumping off that cliff, I finish this very first blog with a running start and a leap of faith! Here I goooooooo!
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