I Finally Framed My "Five Dogs Playing Poker" Picture

Last weekend, I got arrested by the cops...

okay, I didn't actually get arrested,
and he wasn't exactly a cop...

but its not very exciting to write:

Last weekend, I got reprimanded by a part time security guard...

It just doesn't have the same kind of pizazz.

We had free tickets for the Museum of Modern Art last weekend (freebie from Mark's company) so we drove in for an afternoon of culture...

and as we headed up to the first floor of the exhibit, there was this really cool abstract painting at the top of the stairs. So I reached into my purse, pulled out my cell phone, flipped it open...

and he was at my elbow like a flash...
(which was really amazing because 30 seconds earlier, he had been at the other end of the room, sitting on a pink metal chair, which I think was part of the exhibit...oops)

"sorry lady, you can't take pictures in here"

"okay, no problem..."

but after a few minutes,
I began to notice he was kinda following me around...
and not because I've lost a few pounds either...

Every time I stopped to look at a painting or another piece of art work, there he was. And for a little while I told myself, "its just a coincidence, he's just patrolling around..." But since paranoia runs like a river on my side of the family, its was only inevitable that after a few minutes, I began to think..."he thinks I'm going to take a picture! he's going to throw me out of the museum! he's going to have a friend who really is a cop arrest me! how am I going to survive in prison?"

So by the time we get to the next floor,
I'm now completely convinced of it...
and then it happens...
this second guy in a uniform starts to follow me...
every corner I turn, there he is.

but after a couple of minutes,
I noticed he had a broom in his hand...

okay, so it was the custodian...but it really could have happened...he could have been following me...I'm not completely paranoid...after all I'm pretty sure I heard this coming from the radio on his belt...

static..."Did she make it up there yet? Any sign of the perpetrator? Be on the look out for any sudden phone flipping. 10-4" static...

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