I Brought An Extra $50 To The Last Family Reunion

I've been avoiding my blog again...avoiding it like a third cousin at a family reunion, the one who always wants to "hold" 20 bucks...

I guess "neglecting" would be a better choice. "Hiding from" or "Retreating" might also work. I've been like this for weeks now, not only with the blog but with life. Keeping to myself, occasionally coming out, but mostly keeping to myself. Unfortunately that included the Lord. I've been keeping myself from Him too. But there's a difference in the keeping. The keeping from the world has been about the doldrums, the "I don't want too's", the winter blahs. The keeping from the Lord has been about one thing and one thing only, an unhealthy fear of Him.

The latest Bible study we are participating in at church is from Priscilla Shirer, Beth Moore and Kay Arthur. This past week, Beth taught about healthy and unhealthy fear of the Lord. And the ways in which they manifest themselves. My unhealthy fear of the Lord had gotten to a point of complete distraction. It's all I thought about, and when I got sick of thinking about it, I did what I've always done when things are tough, found something else to distract myself with. Just like the Walmart photographer used to do when I would take the kids to get their pictures taken. "Hey little girl! Look over here at the shiny toy!" Snap, snap, snap. So I brought out my favorite distractions, the toys I love best, the cream of the crop...the tv, the internet, and McDonalds.

for weeks, and weeks we've played together...

And then Wednesday morning I prayed,

And He was there. And the unhealthy fear wasn't.

The distractions I've been playing with for the last few weeks aren't too happy right now, I think they're looking for some attention...maybe if I give them the 20 bucks I had tucked away for cousin Larry, they'll hit the road...

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