I wrote a letter of complaint today...
(an email really)
and I actually sent it.
With my stomach in knots, my fingernails chewed and a worn spot on the floor from pacing, I composed an email about a concern I have about an problem at the kids high school.
But this post isn't about the problem, its about the email.
and it all boils down to this...I absolutely hate confrontations.
I was a people pleaser for alot of years, and if I'm not careful, I can easily fall right back into that same pattern. It has only been because of His grace, and the work of the Holy Spirit in my life that that bondage no longer has me in chains. But I still struggle with confrontations. I've been equipped by the Lord to handle any thing life throws at me but in this one area I still make the choice to allow fear to control me. He has equipped me. And yet I still fear.
But I even choose which confrontations I'm going to fear...weird huh? Certain situations, like dealing with pushy salespeople, I handle fine. But a face to face with a friend that has hurt me? I'm a quivering bowl of lemon jello. Or confronting someone in authority? I feel a little faint just writing it.
So I'd like to think that writing this email today was another small step towards being the daughter of Christ He knows I can be. I just have to keep reminding myself of who I am in Him. And as our senior pastor says, "you never have to apologize for doing the right thing"